Change yourself, then change the world

Dear Rhonda and Dr. Cheri,

I work for a corporation with a nonprofit that helps kids with cancer. I’m in my 20s and have a master’s degree in sociology.

When I was in high school, I was horribly bullied by a particular girl, just for being fat.

She and her friends were popular. She tortured me with put-downs, made up stories, and took pictures of me which she edited to make me look worse. They wound up in our yearbook and I can’t ever escape them.

Surprise! She’s now a manager at the same corporation I work with.

I’ve lost weight. I’m not skinny like her. However, I dress well and I have great friends at work.

Lately, I’ve seen her whispering to people at work. I don’t understand why she’s doing this. It’s making me so anxious to think about what she’s doing and saying.

I came to this company because I thought I could make a difference for kids around the whole world. Now, I don’t trust what she’ll do … ruin my life again?



Dear Ruined,

We understand that an unwelcome blast from your past seems unbearable. Ruin means that someone can reduce you to rubble.

As hard as it may be to swallow, she can only try to make you a victim. But you have the power to choose not to participate in her made-up stories about you. That’s much mightier.

If you choose to step away from her, you can become the captain of your own ship. You’ll remain untarnished by her character flaw and unstuck as a victim.

Say something like this: “I’m sure you don’t want to battle a strong woman like me with a mission to help kids. After all, we were kids once and it wasn’t great being your victim. We’re grown-ups now, who can contribute to the building up of kids, instead of tearing them down.”

Our Triangle-of-Triumph™ is a program that takes you from being a victim to a survivor to a leader.

By choosing not to stay a victim and loving yourself, genuinely complimenting others, talking about the important things in your life (such as family, integrity, civility), you will be able to engage with “healthy people.”

This is your life. Choose to own it and express your greatness. Love yourself. Choose to un-tether yourself from her victimization. Claim your power of love.

Become an excellent leader with our 5 C’s- Civility, Courage, Confidence, Creativity, and Communication.

Change yourself, once and for all, and you’ll find yourself changing the lives of your kids in all the world.


Rhonda and Dr. Cheri

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